Michael W. Smith is not that innocent

Hi there. My name is Michael W. Smith. You might know me as “Smitty”, “The smiling savior of CCM”, “That dude who wrote ‘Friends are Friends Forever’”, or “That dude who is slightly better than John Tesh at singing canned worship songs”. Yes, I am all those things, but I would rather have you refer to me as “Teh sux0rs”. Yes, I am teh sux0rs. I know, you think I am being too hard on myself. But it’s the truth. The truth is that I am a complete sellout. Yes, I have joined the ranks of the sellouts that have gone before me. Sellouts such as: Jessica Simpson, The entire nation of France, Incubus, and our neighbor the north, Canada. I think it’s high time that this nation knew the truth. I can hide it no longer. I present to you proof that I am a sellout. The following link will take you to two downloads. The first is my new single “All in the Serve”. If you couldn’t tell, I stole that little tune from a blonde teenager. Well, now she is no longer a teenager, She is a mommy married to a white thug named K-fed. The second link is both of our songs layered on top of each other. Both downloads should contain sufficient proof that I am a sellout and teh sux0rs.

Proof of teh sux0r

I know your probably disappointed in me, and you should be. My last good album was Picture Perfect. I should have quit then. But I continued, remember my hit worship song “Agnus Dei”? Really, Im dyslexic, I really wanted to write a song about Angus Day, a day filled with steaks, hamburgers and the like. Of course my manager rewrote the song to be a worship song. So america, I want to apologize for being a sellout. Im especially sorry for those Iowans who went to a concert at the State Fair where David Crowder opened for me. Really I should have opened for him. Please stop buying my albums, we all know my glory days are over, just let me be. If you pray for me, I’ll pray for you, I’ve no longer got a secret ambition, I just want to be your friend forever.

Sincerely,

Teh Sux0rs